He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
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