whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
