thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
Randomize
