And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Randomize
