Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
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