so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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