dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
the night ended with taco bell and tears
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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