Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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