Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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