You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize