I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
