I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
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