final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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