Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
What drink are we having for lunch?
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Randomize
