the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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