you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
