is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
