Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
I just gift wrapped bread.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Randomize
