carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
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