I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize