No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
