when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
