So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Randomize
