Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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