Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Screwed.edu
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Randomize
