Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
there was a trapeze. enough said
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
We don't watch enough power rangers
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
