finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize