I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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