If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
