I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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