I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
