she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize