it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
