i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
