Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
