I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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