ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Randomize
