Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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