We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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