I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
