he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
