how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Randomize
