hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
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