i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Randomize
