Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Randomize