It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
BRING THE BAGELS
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Randomize
