question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
