the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
