He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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