her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Your cock deserves a montage
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Randomize
