Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize
